Sacrifice is Love

Everyone has a family, and some people are more fortunate than others to have them present in their life. Luckily, I was not only was raised by one but both of my parents. I am able to say this because of my parents sacrifices. 

My parents were both born and raised in Santiago, located in the Dominican Republic. My mom went into college but didn’t finish and my father received his masters but in the Dominican Republic. I say this because education has always played a big role in the way I was raised. I was rewarded for getting high grades to motivate me to keep getting them. To be honest, it did work but as I got older, I realized there was more to it than I thought. 

Santiago, Dominican Republic

My father was one of six boys in his family. He always wanted the best for himself and worked extremely hard to get into college. Unlike in the U.S., he had to pay for his entire tuition. With the help of family members including an aunt who still lives in the Dominican Republic, he was able to attend. I never met her, nor do I know her name, my father has told me several times that he is grateful for how she helped him. Originally, he wanted to study accounting, but it cost too much so he had to study business. My father would always tell me how privileged I am in America and that he would have to walk a couple of miles with some of his brothers just to get to school while holding all their books. Sometimes they would have to go to the library for hours during breaks and after school to study because they couldn’t afford to buy all their books. And while they were walking, they would get hungry and climb mango trees for a snack since they didn’t have food to eat and it’s not like America where you can find a deli or fast food on most blocks. He did this daily for four years to be able to have a job in an office and give other people orders instead of him working for another person. Yet, he gave it all up for me.

When my mom was pregnant with me, she moved to the U.S. and stayed with her father who already has his citizenship. Originally, she lived in New Jersey with him but then she moved to the Bronx after finding a job in a hair salon. My mom wanted my father to come but he didn’t want to because he worked so hard to be where he was at and he didn’t want to give it up. My mom didn’t care, she felt like our life would be better here in the U.S., so she left. After I was born, she did occasionally go with me to visit my dad, but he still remained there which is very weird. I say this because in our culture, usually the man leaves the woman and child so he can get a home and job to bring them. This usually takes several years so the father would send money back to D.R. every month to support his family. Thankfully, this wasn’t my case because it often ends up taking 2-10 years for the father to get enough money and a home to bring his family from D.R. to America.

I always wondered why my father came to America because before he came, he worked in an office for a company how he always wanted to. Of course, he started off small, but he was in a position that can lead him to success if he works hard. He was happy there, so happy that he remained their while his daughter and wife were in America. I learned that this came to an end one day when I was about two years old. When I asked my dad why he came, he said it was because I told him to. When I was two years old, I would speak to my father on the phone all the time since I couldn’t see him physically and I would tell him to come live with me and one day he really did.

Its heartwarming to see what people do for their loved ones. Both my parents came to a country that was foreign to them that speaks a language they don’t know just to make sure I had the best life possible. My dad threw basically threw away all his years of studying for me because a degree from D.R. is worthless in America. 

Growing up I lived with both my parents, my uncle who was my moms’ brother, my aunt who is my mom’s cousin and my two cousins who are my

aunt’s children who are both older than me. When I was four years old, my parents ended up moving out into our own apartment which was still in the Bronx and about 10 blocks away. We moved out because my aunt got married so she didn’t want her kids and husband and her to all sleep in one room. My dad would always leave to work super early like around 6 am and come back home at 3-6 pm. Every time he would come home, he was so tired and if I wanted to go to the park sometimes, he’ll take me. As I got older, I learned he worked in a cable warehouse located in hunts point and he was a manager, so he always had to be available. There were so many times we were outside on his day off of work and he would receive a call and have to pick up. One time we were in American Eagle in Bay Plaza and next on the line when he got a call and walked out of the store. Before he walked out, he handed me his card and I didn’t know what to do and was scared. I ended up having to fake his signature and wait for him to finish speaking on the phone because he would pay me attention. If he was off or on vacation and was called in, he had to drop whatever he was doing and go. At some point I hated this and felt like he was always working but then I realized that’s how we live how we do. I always had things that some other classmates of mine weren’t able to get such as an iPod, MacBook, iPad, iPhone, ds, wii and many other electronics and toys that were popular. Even though I’ll get these, he was really big on saving money and it rubbed off on me.

Many things my parents did while raising me that I used to dislike, I appreciate and do now. For instance, the way they would only reward me if my grades were good because sometimes, I’ll be scared. I used to hate when my dad would only buy me $100 worth of clothes because it wouldn’t feel like enough but now, I know how to stretch my money when spending it. A big thing that I feel like impacted me the most however was my allowance. I would get $20 a week and I would save up to buy things I want instead of asking for it and I would be able to go really long using one $20 bill which is a talent if you ask me. Now I don’t receive such luxuries because I have a job. Since I work, I save most of the money I make which is a little hypocritical of me since I hated when my dad did it. I try to go out here and there while spending the least amount of money possible even when it’s hard. I also have to focus on college and maintain a high gpa which can be stressful at times since I don’t get paid much at times and my dad now lives in Miami while I still live in the Bronx, so I don’t ask for help.  Even though things are online in school, it is still really hard to keep up sometimes but thinking about how my parents would feel motivates me. They sacrificed their dreams and provided me with everything I needed and more so that I can be able to go to college and be an independent woman. 

Works Cited

“SANTIAGO DE LOS CABALLEROS – FEBRUARY 4, 2018: Colorful Victorian House Facade in the Town of Santiago, Dominican Republic.” Dreamstime, Vicente Garrido, Santiago, 4 Feb. 2018, www.dreamstime.com/santiago-de-los-caballeros-february-colorful-victorian-house-facade-town-dominican-republic-image167099872.